PFFFFFHHHHHTTTTTTTT!!!!

I am in such a deep blue FUNK this week. I feel unloved unwanted, unuseful, un-funny! I may blog about it later, but right now I feel that if I did I would either be royally pissed or whine so much that you all would be turned off. SO I won't write today about it.

INSTEAD if you want to learn about differing life-styles, customs etc. Be sure to go to Robert Brady He has a whole week of posts on there about FIREWALKERS. THere are five installments complete with pictures. It is great!!! I read him every evening. His Love for his Family comes through so much, and his love for his new country does also. I say new, but he has been an ex-patriot in Japan for about 25 years now. I love reading his blog.

Another one to research is JoelHe has a wonderful way of writing, that just pulls you in. He links quite a bit, which I don't like, because I have such a difficult time downloading with our antique phone lines out here. (Still dial-up!) But he also writes about topics that get you thinking.

A great essay writer to go to and read once in awhile is USS CLUELESS He was one of the first blogs I read, when I first started blogging. I will admit some of what he writes I do not read. Most of what he writes is so far over my head, that I don't understand it, but every once in awhile he gives you another reason to re-think your stand on certain topics. He is all writing, and takes no comments.

I have to leave you with a funny that I have been saving for a rainy day...beleive me it is one today, both emotional and actual.

The Middle Wife...

How would you like to be this teacher? (A grammar school teacher from
Miami, remembers this Oscar-worthy birth tableau from one of her
students)

I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two children
myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own
first-grade classroom a few years back. When I was a child, I loved
show-and-tell.

So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get
over
shyness and experience a little public speaking. And it gives me a
break
and some guaranteed entertainment.

Usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame. Children bring in pet turtles,
model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And,
never, ever
place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it
to
school and talk about it, they're welcome.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing
child,
takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow
stuffed under her sweater. She holds up a snapshot of an infant.
"This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell you about his
birthday. First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and
then
Dad put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate
for
nine months through an umbrella cord."

She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not
to
laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The children are
watching
her in amazement.

"Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, "Oh,
oh,
oh!'" Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. "She walked
around
the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!'"

Now the child is doing this hysterical duck walk; holding her back
and
groaning. "My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she
doesn't have
a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in
bed
like this." Erica lies down with her back against the wall.

"And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case
he
got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like
psshhheew!"
This child is sitting on the floor with her little hands miming water
flowing away. "Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push, and
breathe, breathe." They started counting, but never even got past
ten."
"Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky
stuff. They said it was from Mom's play-center, so there must be a lot
of stuff
inside there for him to do "

Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her
seat.
I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, if it's
show-and-tell
day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another Erica comes along.
Life is meant to be lived .. enjoy.