Friday, February 20, 2009

Stupid people!!!

THis thought to be extinct bird was photographed in the Phillipines in a market, then sold and EATEN!!!!

February 18, 2009—A rare quail from the Philippines was photographed for the first time before being sold as food at a poultry market, experts say.

Found only on the island of Luzon, Worcester's buttonquail was known solely through drawings based on dated museum specimens collected several decades ago.

Scientists had suspected the species—listed as "data deficient" on the International Union for Conservation of Nature's 2008 Red List—was extinct.

A TV crew documented the live bird in the market (above) before it was sold in January, according to the Agence France-Press news agency.

Michael Lu, president of the Wild Bird Club of the Philippines, told AFP the bird's demise should inspire a "local consciousness" about the region's threatened wildlife.

"What if this was the last of its species?" Lu said.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009


I purposely stayed away from the Hospice so that Mike could spend time with his friends and Family alone. The Band that he started and the ones that evolved from that one all got together for a party Friday night. There were over 50 people there and Mike had a great time, although he was exausted after a few hours. Saturday was the day he wanted alone with Sherry, so no one went out. Sunday there were quite a few there, and Donna went down and spent some time with him. Today I went for the first time in 4 days, and He looked very wasted from Thursday afternoon. He is pale, sleeps a lot, and looks like he is 80 yrs old. I took Rocky in, and he was glad to see Mike and vice versa, but then he came over and layed down by ME! (oops)

Sherry has this week off and is staying right by his side so he is not alone. I do not expect it to be much longer than a week to 10 days. He is soooo tired.

I have been on an emotional roller coaster going through the family albums and finding pictures of him through out his life. I guess when I left home in 1969 no one bothered to take pictures of either him or Phyllis, as there just ARE NOT any!
This is one of my favorite pictures of him. This was Easter Sunday, when we were all out in the yard hunting eggs, and he was crawling on the sidewalk. Dad took this picture of him. He was such a sweet baby! I was 11 when he was born, and I raised him until I left and he was 12. I spent all weekend finding pictures and then crying. and then laughing. then sniffing.

Hard to explain grief!

Thursday, February 12, 2009


I went and spent the afternoon with Michael today. He is looking very weary. When I got there he had a visitor that he and I adore, so that was ok. I asked him if he had any other visitors and he said Yeah, but he could not remember who they were. I asked if he knew who Merrily was and he smiled and said yes, an angel. Which she is! and he knew who I was. Then Sumre came in and brought her dog, and I had Rocky so he was surrounded by fur babies. We sat and watched Mike nod off, and wake up, then Merrily left. Shortly there after, some one else from his church came over, and that is when the care taker came in and said Mike are you ready for your Nap? (a signal that there was too many non-family visitors for the day) Mike said yeah, so the other people left and Sumre and I sat and talked and watched Mike Nod off. He is very tired and looking very wasted now. He is not in pain, and that is the important thing.

After about 3 hours, I tip-toed up and told him I loved him and he opened one eye and nodded. I then told him I would see him later and I left. I told the Dr. Ann that I would not be there tomorrow for his party, but I would be back on Saturday, and that is when she told me that No! Mike had asked that there be no visitors other than Sherry on Saturday, as he wanted to spend the last Valentine's Day alone with her. (SNORF!!!) Galen knows this too, so we will respect those wishes and leave them alone. I will be there on Sunday with DOnna.

This is really HArd! I can keep up a good brave front, but when I am alone, I fall apart!

I think I will go to be3d early tonight, and just escape!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Misc Pictures

Here are a few pictures I have been meaning to post just not got around to.

Dona Caught me in a rare moment of laughter...(LOLOL)

Tim sent this with his cell phone, so the quality is not really good, but it does show he is working hard! (THANK YOU LORD!)

THis little bird has been evading me for years...this time I got a positive identification! It is a female TOwnsend's Warbler. I stole the picture off the web, so if you took it, let me know so I can give you credit.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Enso House Hospice...

I went and spent the day with Mike yesterday. I got there and he was up and sitting in front of the fireplace that is out of this world beautiful!! They built a fire just for him. HE was comfortable sitting there, and there was a nice comfy wing back chair for me to sit in, so I got out my knitting and sat. Mike fell asleep sitting up, so it was just me and the silence all around except for the popping of the fireplace. I think it was as therepudic for me as for anybody.

Mike woke up and wanted to go to his room, so we relocated to his room, where he promptly fwell asleep again, and I sat in the big soft rocker and knitted away...a bird feeder right out the window on my right. The view there was so calming, and peaceful, and the rythmic breathing of My Baby Brother gave me peace. He was not in pain, and was resting comfortably. I hope with all my heart that it stays like this until the end.

Phyllis has the watch today, and I will go back tomorrow. I stay until time to go swimming, and then leave. Yesterday I was looking forward to that swim. I was a bit dismayed because the water was so cold, but I swam for 40 minutes until the "ladies of the rowing club" decided that my lane was the best place to practice. ARRRRRGHHHHHH!!!! Bitches! I needed the swim, as I felt like someone had hammered me down to 5'8" from my normal 6'1". The tension between my shoulder blades was horrible.

It is snowing today, BEAUTIFUL on the grass and trees and just warm enough that it melts on the roads! Hey what better kind of snow can you ask for! Should turn into rain by this afternoon.

Well I have things to do and places to go, so I will stop for today...Pray for a quick and peaceful end for Mike please.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

roller coaster emotions....

Sherry put Mike in a pallitive care facility on Friday. As I said before, they discontinued all life giving supplements. So We were expecting him to go this weekend. Today he is doing quite well, sitting up and talking, and laughing. It is as if he was just a little sick.

The home is a privately run hospice, funded by Buddists, and it is non-denominational, and so PEACEFUL!! A lovely place, and Mike is the only one there right now.

After last week, not sleeping and grieving, I expected the end soon, but it appears as if he may pull thrugh this crisis and last a little longer than the Nurses said. Whoo-boy! Talk about ups and downs. I have not been sleeping and neither has Phyllis, until this weekend. My kids both came home and we all went and spent the day with Mike, and I got some much needed sleep!

I have been appointed to make a power point presentation of Mike's life...and I have no idea where to start. So I will be thinking of pictures to pull out and get scanned.

I am heading to the pool tomorrow! I NEED to float in warm water for awhile.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Final days....

AS of Yesterday, Mike has been taken off of all feeding tube, oxygen, and pumps, he just has the pump with his pain meds, and they are just keeping him comfortable. He has been moved to Enso House, which is a home for Pallitive care. on SOuth Whidbey. They will keep him there under 24 hour care until he finally lets go and it will be over. Right now he is still lucid and alert, and has good times and bad times, the worst time being the realization that this is it folks! He is scared of dying. He is new to Faith, and I dont think he really understands.

His family was there with him all night last night, and today my family and Phyllis are going to go visit, and take his dog to see him. I have custody of ROCKY until Sherry can take him back home.

I have not bween able to concentrate on any thing other than Mike for a week, so If I have not been by your place, this is why. Sometimes life just gets in the way, and you have to deal with it.

I am much better, and able to sleep again, although I did spend two very restless nights crying, sleeping, crying etc. Now that my Kids are home, I feel much better.

Please keep Sherry and Mike in your thoughts and prayers, and hope for a fast and painless departure from this world into the next one for Mike.

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Update: My Baby Brother


Well, it is not looking good at all. Sherry and Galen made the decision with the Dr. To stop his intravenous feeding, and the Chemo and just give him the drugs to keep him comfortable. He will be released to Home care tomorrow, and Galen will be there until Sherry can take off work. They say that he will just slowly go to sleep and then die. I went in to see him this afternoon and he looked like death already. He was having labored breathing, but his color was good. His eyes are really dark and sunken too. It won’t be much longer. I am hoping along with Phyllis and others that he goes tonight, in the hospital, so Sherry does not have to deal with that alone at home.

Damn it! This is so hard!! He is only 53!

I'm Not ready for this.... :(

Ok, Crisis averted.

Donna you already know, but here is the full story. Mike went in for surgery this afternoon to have his port changed from his neck into his chest. Just as he was being returned to the ward, he quit breathing, turned blue and then purple and they were having a real difficult time keeping him breathing. They moved him to ICU and were working on him and he threw up and then aspirated some of it into his lungs. They took x-rays and there is something in there, but they are not sure (at Least Sherry was not sure ) whether it was vomitus or cancer. All of this happened right at 6:00, so Sherry called Phyllis who called me and we all met at the ICU. I just got home,(11:00) and Mike is sleeping now, which is a good sign, HOWEVER, this could turn into pneumonia at any time, and that will be bad.

Galen got here in time to give Mike a massage, and watch him go to sleep, so then we all discussed what Sherry should do if he crashes again. She did not know what to do. SO You know me, Big Mouth, I said as Oldest member of the family I suggest a no-resuscitate order from here on in, especially if they cannot guarantee that he will have any better quality of life than he has had this week. Phyllis agreed with me and Sherry started crying and said she felt guilty for thinking that way. We assured her that there was absolutely NO GUILT at all, and that was the way he was raised.

So now we are all at home waiting for morning to see what happens next. Keep him in your prayers, thoughts whatever. I hope he goes soon, and peacefully.