Thursday, May 20, 2004

Their best "green" advice is to let Mother Nature take her course. Those caterpillars will be all gone in three weeks.

Please tell me it isn't so!!! I sprayed out back, and it killed all the ones I sprayed. Then yesterday I sprayed out front, and it killed all the ones I sprayed. Now they are migrating in from the woods, and are all over the backyard again! It is really getting to me. All the articles I have read said that they will continue to migrate in from the woods until their cocoons are all spun. THEN the moths will hatch! I remember the moths from last year being really thick! You could not go out the door without almost swallowing one. I had no idea these were the result of the damned caterpillars, or rather the caterpillars were the result of the damned moths.

My grass is wriggling with the things, I so want to get out and plant, but I ain't sitting on that grass!! I can just see on of them or a few hundred of them crawling up my pant legs!! I would be jumping up and stripping right there in the yard. That would really set the neighbors off! I can see the headlines in the weekly newspaper now. Wild raging woman strips in full view of neighbors while screaming DIE BASTARDS! DIE!! Since it is always a slow news day around here, I would probably even make the nightly news on KING5!

They are getting to me! I dream about the BASTARDS! I fear going to the mailbox! I dread opening either door for fear one of them will fall on me. I run hop skip jumping into the car, slam the door, and then frantically look to make sure none followed me in. I would hate to be driving down Highway 20 at 60 MPH, and find a few of them crawling up my legs and then trying to stomp them off while hitting the gas pedal and then the brake. The gas pedal and the brake, the gas pedal the brake the.......... CRUNCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Headlines now read...Woman hits telephone pole while fighting killer caterpillars!!

No comments: