Morning musings

I had to get up early this morning, Donna had to go get her car from the repair shop, and I got the pleasure of taking her there. I say pleasure and mean it, because the morning was gorgeous!!! The temperature got down into the low 20's last night, so everything was covered with white hoar frost. As I was coming back along the curves by the O.L.F., the fog had formed along the ground. THe sun was just coming up over the trees, and turning the fog pink and mauve. It was forming in layers too, so there were different colored stripes in the fog levels. Beautiful. The hunters were out in their bright orange vests and their dogs, walking the cut wheat fields looking for pheasants. The spider webs that were woven between the two sets of power/telephone lines were highlighted by the fog and frost, and really stuck out, where you wouldn't normally see them.

I was driving along thinking what a beautiful morning and that I was glad I was able to see it. I then thought of CJ. She is undergoing a heart operation today, that might not work. I have to have faith that it will. There are so many things that are done today, that even five years ago, were un heard of. I do not know her entire history, as we just met, but she hit a nerve in me, and I feel very close to her. Don't even know her real name. I said a little prayer that she would be able to see many more mornings like this. I hope it gets answered.

SAdie is running through the house like her tailend was on fire. She was outside in the freezing weather for an hour, runnning and chasing the birds away from the feeders. I worked so hard to get them to come, and she is chasing them all away. I have not seen "Lola" in awhile. I know squirrels do not hibernate, but they also do not come out when it gets cold. They store up for the winter, all the peanuts, and pumpkin seeds I have been putting out all summer. I even saw her burying some right in the grass. I did not see any sticky notes, so I don't know how she'll remember where she puts them. I was kinda hoping that once the sun came out she would reappear.

I have been trying to spit out things that have been in my head, and get them all formulated so that they would be coherent, but all I get are spits and spots. Lots of ideas, but nothing of substance. I even thought about posting some of the writing that I did while I was stationed in Adak. Nothing to do there but reflect and write. I would take a beer or two, and a tablet and go out on the tundra or to the Bering Sea wall, or up a mountain, and just write what ever popped into my head. Some times it was about the scenery, sometimes about my Non-relationship with Bob, sometimes about the stress and frustration of knowing that I have to work, and when I work, I have to excel, and how lonely, how terribly lonely it can be. I do not have many friends I have a tendency to push them away. Afraid that either they want to be friends because they think they can get special treatment, or what....? I have made some with the playhouse, and I am thankful for them. I have made some with my blog, even though I have never met them. I have some that I know from my travels, that I keep in casual touch with, But the best friends I have are my babies. There is a fuzzy soft grey tabby half on my lap, and half on the keyboard, that purrs softly, and loves me unconditionally. There is an orange tabby that loves to lick my face around 400 AM and then try to crawl up my nose, all the while purring loudly and making mudpies in my boobs. THere is an old Manx that sleeps beside me every night as close as he can get to my butt, then stretches out his claws and digs into my fat ass. He LOVES me. He purrs loudly and drools all over the sheets. There is Ethel, who is the Feral kitty, and loves me so much, she knows when I am in pain, and she will sneak up and lay on my hand so all I have to do is wiggle my fingers and I am scratching her tummy. She also drools when she purrs. Sadie loves me, but she is still an ornery little shit, and likes to terrorize everyone.

I have a special relationship with my SIster. We fight, we argue, we have differing views on religion, and politics, but she is always there. I can call her at anytime and laugh. We watch tv and if we see something funny we call and as we pick up the phone we are laughing because we know what the other is going to say. You will come to like her too. SHe is the one who keeps herself so busy doing things for her friends that she has no time for herself. But that is what keeps her going. I envy her.